tired

being entirely honest now... i'm tired. i'm overwhelmed. i'm in a complete mess and need a few days or weeks to straighten myself out- straighten out my priorities and to straighten out my mind. 

i don't want to go out... to chill with people this week... despite all my plans already, i think i'm just going to flop.

i really don't know what i'm doing anymore. im cracking and giving in. i'm giving up.

tired. unwilling. tired. unmotivated. 

i just can't wait till everything is over... and summer begins... then i'll party all day erday with ya'll. 　

ARCHERY OFSAA 2012

Back from a long good day at OFSAA!
Beat my personal best.
Saw a few of my Toronto friends. (and got bullied by TC's :c)
Ray bought us Timbits :3.
Door prizes always make me happy!
OFSAA musical today! not even kidding... jammin along with my butt mates HAHA

-- I can't stand helping you anymore.

You ask me for help. I give you advice, but you go running off doing the opposite after. You don't listen to my advice, but honestly you're just wasting my time and my effort in trying to help fix your problems and to make you feel better.

I warned you, and you didn't listen - so now you can learn this the hard way, by yourself. Don't say I didn't try. I don't want to put in effort to help you if you aren't even putting in any effort to help yourself. 

But who am I kidding... I'll still be there for you because you're my friend. I can't control myself. But it's really getting quite pointless at this stage and really quite annoying. I'm getting frustrated with your stupidity for falling in this mess over and over again. 

Long week....

It's been a long long week. A long week of shit load of essays, tests and assignments. Overwhelmed and stressed. And it's not even over. Got a lot more of it in the two coming months. Pulled my first all nighter yesterday and all I have to say is... I'm never doing that again. I was sleep deprived to the MAX. I can live just sleeping one hour, but a straight up all nighter... that was horrible. My brain was trippin ballz and honestly not functioning properly.

Other than that... I spent today studying for my chemistry test and going out enjoying the nice weather on this PD day :3. Got myself some half price happy hour frap and watched The Avengers with some pretty smexy peeps and my boyfriend~ All I have to say is... IT WAS EPIC LOL. No kidding... that movie was REALLY good. I've always enjoyed Marvel movies, but this was by far one of the best. It was hilarious (the Hulk and Loki moment GG LOLOL). But yea, just spent the rest of the day pretty much just chilling with my boyfriends friends, which one of them happened to be one of my summer school friend too, so it was pretty nice seeing him again. Fun fun times.... it's nice chilling with the "not usual" people sometimes... so I had a pretty enjoyable day today! 

Got a long day tomorrow at the temple tho- got a fundraiser dinner to help host so got to get at least 1/3 of my studying done tonight! q_q 

Best 4 years of archery

Long day at ROPSSAA today... but it was fun!
Broke my 400 goal and made it to top 10 for my category (Girls Olympic). Was also one point away from the girl who got 6th place (which would have gotten you a ribbon :c)... but no loss, because a girl on our team won it HEHEEH.
Our main goal was to place in the top 3 for team champion and we did for 3/4 of the categories! (Girls Olympic and standard and boys Olympic) HEHEHE and got 2nd. Sad thing was they were cheap this year, so we didnt get any medals, instead... we got ribbons LOL but... i guess better than nothing.

In my four years of archery, we went from not staying for the awards ceremony, to BEING in the ceremony... honestly, the best way to have ended my year of archery at ROPSSAA. \( ; u ; )/ I'm so proud of you kiddies!!

Cant wait till OFSAA! Provincialsssssss woohooo!!

And I think I say this on behalf of the team... that Hoho has good vegetables LOL.

3

My lame gift to my boyfriend HAHA
Missioned in the rain to go to the supermarket yesterday which was NBD- tho my backpack and notes got pretty drenched LOL

3 months and going... c:
I ain't the best... nor do I know what the hell I'm doing half the time; I piss ya off frequently, and you're still here with me, and I really, truly do appreciate it.

Words can't even describe how lucky I feel, to have you in my life, to be able to call myself your girlfriend and to have your love.
I hope things will only get better from here on out.
I'm not quiet sure what I'd do without you in my life, honestly.
I'm head over heels in love with my best friend.

I'm just there for when you need me

Kept and cherished when you're needed, but tossed aside when they're done. Maybe I'm over reacting, maybe I'm over analysing... but that's how I feel. Always from the people I cared the most about. That's why it hurts so much. But I should be getting use to this right? But I'm not... and it hurts just as much each time.

It use to bother me-

just seeing your name, or a photo of you. It would make me feel a bit jealous.. but I realized a few days ago, that I no longer feel that way about you anymore. I feel... nothing. Absolutely nothing.
: )

bed

woke up at 7:30 this morning. did some yoga, ate breakfast, and crawled back to hiding under my warm blankets.
curled up in fetal position, getting advices from a good friend.